The best dating apps for introverts who prefer books to bars

two people sitting in a coffee shop

If the thought of ordering a drink at a crowded bar or making small talk with strangers at a party fills you with the incomprehensible urge to jump out the nearest window, you’re probably an introvert — and that’s totally okay! We see you. We are you.

There’s no shame in being more comfortable curled up with a good book than out on the town, but that doesn’t mean you have to resign yourself to a life of solitude, either. In fact, introverts make for amazing partners, lovers, and friends — once we get to know someone.

Where do introverts find love?

This may come as a shock, but dating apps (and even some of the old-school dating sites that are still hanging around) are the place for introverts. On these platforms, you can show off who you really are without feeling the pressure to constantly be “on” like you might in a traditional social setting.

Yes, it’s true that dating apps still get a bad rap as a last resort for the desperate, but for introverts, these nifty little tools provide a much-needed buffer that allows us to slowly and comfortably get to know potential partners. When you meet someone online, you can take the time to build the kind of deep, meaningful connections that often feel out of reach in today’s fast-paced, surface-level dating culture.

What are the best dating sites for introverts?

Even though we’re big fans of online dating, especially for our introverted readers, not all dating platforms are created equal. Tinder, for example, is pretty much the polar opposite of what introverts are looking for. Its hookup-centric interface and “swipe left” model are a recipe for disaster for shy singles who prefer to get to know their matches before jumping into bed. (If dating apps were places, Tinder would be the crowded sports bar.)

Instead, we’ve found dating apps like Hinge, OkCupid, and Match are much better suited for introverts. Unlike Tinder, these dating platforms encourage users to share a little bit more about themselves, from lengthy profile bios to lists of interests and deal-breakers.

So, to help you find your person — the one who’ll understand and appreciate you for who you truly are — we’ve rounded up the best dating sites for introverts just like you. (Including a few niche dating sites and some picks for hooking up, because we all have needs. Just because you're introverted doesn't mean you can't have a little fun.)

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