You might know them as popsicles. Or maybe even ice blocks. But, in Britain, they're called ice lollies. And they are the only way to get through a British heatwave.
Growing up in the '90s in rural north Warwickshire, I was something of an ice lolly aficionado.
I don't mean to brag or anything, there was just not a lot to do in Wood End back then. During the interminable six-week summer holiday, I'd cycle across the park to the corner shop where I'd part with my pocket money in exchange for whichever lolly took my fancy that day.
I've since discovered other ways to spend my money, but whenever the temperature soars (which, let's face it, isn't often) I get the urge to cycle across the park in search of frozen sweet refreshment.
But, if you asked me to name my absolute, hands-down, one-true-favourite ice lolly, I'd have some trouble settling on just one. Do I go for my childhood fave, the Mini Milk? What about the tropical tartness of the beloved Twister? What about the sweet Solero Exotic?
As temperatures in the UK hit 30C (86F) for the first time this year, I thought it only right to ask my esteemed Mashable colleagues and the good people of Twitter their favourite British lollies of all time. Reader, I present to you a definitive ranking of the greatest ice lollies to grace this Scepter'd Isle. Don't @ me.
Now, before we proceed, I need to clarify one important thing. In this list, you'll find both ice lollies AND ice-cream lollies. I have no time for ice lolly purists. If you don't believe that Magnums or Cornettos are ice lollies, this list is not for you.
14. Ice Pops
Look, I loved these when I was little. But now that my palette has matured, I can categorically say that Ice Pops are trash. You're basically just sucking fluorescent liquid concoctions out of a plastic tube. If you eat these in adulthood you're basically asking for a paper cut in your mouth. They are the lowest rung on the ice lolly ladder.
13. Fruit Splits
Fruit Splits are the most generic, disappointing ice lollies known to Britain. This is what you ended up with during the hottest day or the year when all the other good lollies were sold out. These were always a disappointment. I hate Fruit Splits.
12. Cornetto
I'm not entirely sure Cornetto even belongs on a list of ice lollies. It does not, after all, have a stick attached to it. But, as I'm feeling generous, and because I'm scared of getting yelled at on Twitter, I'm including it.
11. Jubbly
These triangular ice pops are literally only on this list because of the melty juice that gathers at the bottom of the pouch that you can either suck out, or pour into your mouth. Good.
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10. Nobbly Bobbly
I don't think I've seen these since my childhood, but they occupy a special place in my heart. The sugary bobbly bits (what do we even call them?) make for a very intriguing texture. Objectively good, if not mildly unsophisticated.
9. Fruit Pastille lolly
These are just delightful. Sometimes all you need is a solid block of frozen fruit juice on a stick to get you through the sweaty, sticky summer days. Slurp.
8. Mini Milk
Ah, the humble Mini Milk. When I was a kid, I went mad for Mini Milks. Honestly, I couldn't get enough. Plus they literally cost like 20p. Personally I'd rather place this lolly higher up the list, but you guys are all so thirsty for Feasts and Magnums, you've left me with very little choice. Let the record show that this classic is sorely underrated.
7. Zoom
AKA rocket lollies. Whether you're a Zoom fan, or simply a generic off-brand rocket lolly lover, you can't really go wrong. The people of Britain truly love a layered lolly.
6. Feast
There's a lot of love out there for Feasts. Especially the mint chocolate variety. Based on just how many people have tweeted and emailed me to tell me how they'd lay down their lives for a Feast, it's clear to me that this is a firm favourite.
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5. Magnum
If you're one of the many Magnum lovers out there, you probably hate me for not putting it further up the list. Listen, writing this list was really hard. And if I'm being honest with you, I'm not the world's biggest Magnum lover. And given that it's technically more of an ice cream, I consider it very generous of me to include it here. That said, I wouldn't turn one down if you were handing out Magnums.
4. Calippo Orange
You might not have expected to see this one as high up the list as this, but let me tell you, people bloody love a Calippo. Myself included. One of the most glorious aspects of indulging in a Calippo, is the juicy melty bits at the bottom of the packet that you end up sucking out of the packaging. If you've never tried that, you haven't lived, my friend.
3. Solero Exotic
When I was a kid, I thought Soleros were the most sophisticated ice lolly known to humankind. I would have long elaborate fantasies about my future existence. I'd be walking barefoot on a beach with my Jennifer Aniston haircut, licking a Solero like the classy bitch I knew I'd grow up to be.
2. Fab
There's something really delightful about the different textures going on with a Fab. You've got the bumpy surface of the sprinkle-coated stripe and the smooth frozen fruitiness of the white and pink sections. I'm getting goosebumps just thinking about it tbh.
1. Twister
The Twister is hands down the greatest ice lolly available in Britain today. It has everything you could possibly require from a lolly. A tart jolt of lemon-lime ice to awake you from your heat-induced stupor. A creamy stripe of pineapple ice cream to balance the acidity. It is objectively delicious. If you don't like it, I cannot help you, my friend.
This article was originally published in 2019 and republished in 2023.
